How do you tell others they are wrong?

How are you about others telling you that you are wrong?

Just recently I had somebody tell me I was wrong. Well, they didn’t exactly say it like that, but they did share with me a concern that they had. What they shared was a constructive criticism in regards to one of our systems/processes. Do you know how I responded in my heart? I loved what they said and was so glad they spoke up! Now, before it sounds like I am bragging – Let me assure you most times this is not my internal response!! In fact, if the truth be known, I am not very good at receiving criticism, even if it is constructive. What I wanted to share with you is what made the difference – it all has to do with my bank account. Let me explain – the individual that shared their concern, had made many deposits into my account over the years. In fact, not many people thank me for my preaching more than this person. I have also served in the trenches with this person. They are faithful and kind and I admire them in many ways. Their bank account was so large with me that I didn’t even notice what would normally be a withdraw out of my account.

The whole event just reminded of the importance of loving relationships. I mean, after all, who wants to get advice or criticism from an enemy. Beyond that, we are so fragile we can’t even handle advice from a neutral party. We best receive advice and constructive criticism from those that we know love us.

The bottom line was, I was wrong, they were right and our church will benefit!

Whenever possible we try to eat dinner together as a family. Thankfully, I have a wife who sees eating together for dinner as a very important part of our routine. At dinner we enjoy praying for our “missionary of the night” and regularly answering a question similar to, “What was the favorite part of your day?”. Tonight was a little different though, it was leftover pizza and every man for himself, therefore we didn’t sit down together and dinner just had a different feel.

My experience got me thinking and I want to now share a parallel story:

This past weekend at church MANY people showed up on time  EARLY for “dinner”. Saturday night at 6 and Sunday morning at 9:30 (sorry, for those who were a part of the 11am crowd – not so much) had MANY arrive early for our Walk Thru the Bible review. Not only did we have a great review that was both fun and inspiring, but then we experienced a unique dynamic – TOTAL ENERGY FROM THE VERY START OF THE SERVICE! Most everyone was present in the auditorium. Rather than half the attenders showing up during the first, or worse yet, second, or worst of all, third worship song. If you were there this weekend you know exactly what I am talking about. From the very beginning the services were dynamic, electric, charged and energized! There is just something to be said for everybody being present “around the table”. I have often felt bad for our worship team, who has worked hard to prepare and has prayed hard for God’s moving, as many people seem to be non-chalant about arriving on time and non-chalant about missing a song or two. If the same number of people strolled in during my message I can’t imagine how that would make me feel. As I talk very open about this situation, I realize an important element – I am the leader and I have not led us to change what has become a bad habit at Parkview. The blame does not lie at the feet of some of our congregation it lies at my feet. I have done very little to correct this situation. No longer!

WE MUST REVERSE OUR PREVIOUS  TREND!!!! WE MUST START ARRIVING EARLY!! FULLY PREPARED TO GIVE GOD OUR VERY BEST WORSHIP!!

In closing, I must not overlook the obvious – a good number of our Parkview family are consistently on time and ready to worship. For all of you who do your absolute best not to be late – Thanks for your model. I will be doing all I can to encourage others to follow your example. I know our church expects me to lead and I know this includes the area addressed in this post.