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Fans and Critics

March 1, 2011 in Leadership with 0 Comments

Over the years I have had the privilege of not only working with some amazing people but I have also had the amazing privilege of working for some amazing people. I started working when I was about 13 and through the years learned a few lessons when it comes to working for people. Most of what I learned came through the school of hard knocks.

One thing I learned about my bosses was that they appreciated raving fans and quiet critics. I never did criticize a boss publicly and have it go well:-) On the other hand, I have had a few heart to heart conversations with some bosses (not nearly as many heart to hearts as they had to have with me but I will save that for another post) and as long as it was done in private it was normally well received.

If you have a boss, and in some way it seems like all of us do, remember to be a raving fan publicly and a quiet critic privately. If you cannot be a raving fan then I would begin to look for another opportunity, where you can better utilize your strengths, in an organization where you can be a raving fan. Don’t hang on forever hoping the boss will change so that you can become a raving fan. Life is too short to stay on a dead end street.

Back to my main point – raving fans publicly and quiet critics privately. You, you boss and the staff culture which you are within will all benefit from this principle.

What got me thinking about this whole subject was last week when I was in McD’s and a couple tables over some co-workers were ripping their boss up one side and down the other. I wanted to go over to their table and tell them to do themselves and their boss a favor and give their resignation. Because I could not think of a nice way to say it, because I was not sure how it would be received and because I was studying for a sermon, I decided to keep to myself. The whole incident reminded me of the principle in this post.

In closing, let me bring it home. The elders and I are blessed with an amazing relationship!! This is not to say that we have never disagreed, because we have disagreed. But to my knowledge you have never heard anything that we disagreed about from my side or theirs. I am so thankful for elders who have been raving fans and quiet critics.

Look for a way to publicly express your appreciation for your boss or supervisor today and the next time you have some constructive criticism share it at the right time, in the right place and in the right way. If your boss knows you are a raving fan then he/she will know the heart from which the criticism comes.

In Your Corner

February 10, 2011 in Leadership with 3 Comments

I am absolutely amazed!! I cannot believe the people God has put in my life! My wife is amazing, my family is the best, our staff is very comitted, our elders love me intensely, my friends are so helpful, I have mentors who are so gifted, I have a church family that so knows how to love on their pastor - and I could keep going. Today, more than normal, I am struck by who the Lord has placed in my life. As a part of this equation I also know that most all of these relationships have been intentionally sought out. I say that to ask you – who do you have in your corner? To me, one of the saddest things in life is to watch people doing life alone or coasting at a level that is the result of them having noone challenging them to live on a higher plane. Here is some random advice:

  • Get a mentor – pray one in/seek one out
  • Be a mentor – the mentor always gets more out of the relationship
  • Be intentional about your inner circle
  • Drop bad friends like a bad habit!
  • Don’t play games with your church family. Stop keeping people at arms length. Take off your mask. Build authentic community.
  • Embrace God’s design for your life. He wired you to be relational.
  • Don’t just be friendly, make friends.
  • Find someone this week and go out of your way for them.
  • Stop making excuses and get the right people in your corner!

Random Learning

February 8, 2011 in Leadership with 1 Comment

I love leadership. I love leading, I love learning new principles, I love challenging others in their leadership; there just isn’t much that I don’t love about leadership.

I am in the process of learning a principle about how to deal with difficult/complicated things. Allow me to dialogue: When you and I face something complicated, it tends to only get more complicated. The more we think, the more we strategize, the more we dialogue; that which is complicated, by its very nature, only tends to get more complicated – not always, but often.  So what is the answer? Take a specific action to simplify that which is complicated. Maybe that seems to simple and I am sorry if it does. If I start with at least a part of that which is complicated and I can simplify that one element, then I have taken a big step in lessening the complication. Once I can get traction with the simple component(s) then I can begin to weave in that which is more challenging.

Parkview is experiencing some great days – life change, growth in many areas and the soon opening of our new facility. Right now, by its very nature, things are not getting easier, so I must make them easier. I must break them down, reject the complexity and get traction around the parts that are solvable immediately and then weave in the parts to the problem that are “complicated”. I cannot ignore the complicated, I only break it down in a way that is more manageable and solvable.

I hope these thoughts help. If nothing else this helps me dialogue around a piece of leadership that I am in the throws of learning. By the way, if you ever want great reading on leadership, I highly recommend Courageous Leadership by Bill Hybels and Next Generation Leader by Andy Stanley.

Outside the Walls

December 15, 2010 in Church Life, Leadership with 0 Comments

One of the most important values a church must embrace is that of being externally focused. Being externally focused does not happen automatically- in fact, the exact opposite happens automatically. By nature churches become internally focused. No surprise there, because it is human nature to be self-focused. I wake up everyday with a desire to fulfill my needs and that desire is often more subconscious than it is conscious. I believe the same is true for a church. No healthy faith family says, “Let’s make it all about us and let’s ditch the outside world who so depserately need Christ”. Yet, consciously or subconsciously many churches make that statement through their programming, events, ministries, printed materials, worship services etc. Mnay churches are much more concerned (to an extreme) about keeping those they have than reaching those they don’t have.

Christmas season is a great time of year to be externally focused and it reminds us of the very reason Christ was born – “to keep happy those who are saved” – “to seek and save that which was lost”. I am so proud of our church family for the way we have embraced an external, missional focus. Let me share a few ways we are taking the message to others and where we have an “other’s first” mentality:

  • Living Nativity – THIS YEAR IS GOING TO BE AWESOME
  • Wise Men gift exchange – we have toys everywhere around here right now
  • The launch of Christ the King Community Church in Port Orange – we are averaging multiple families attending church there every weekend
  • 4 Christmas Eve Services – we are blessed to have a couple hundred guests each year
  • A team of 14 that leave for Cambodia the day after Christmas – tremendous global impact
  • And several other small ways that impact specific families

Speaking Up

November 30, 2010 in Leadership, Spiritual Thought with 1 Comment

As a follow-up to this past weekend’s message, I wanted to share some thoughts on what it means to identify ourselves with Christ. Following are some ways to make Christ a natural part of your communication:

  • When talking with someone about what they did for the weekend, talk about how a highlight of your weekend was going to church. Whenever you talk about the weekend make sure you talk about other things but it is a prime opportunity to occassionally talk about church.
  • “God has been so good”. That is it – just a passing tribute to God’s goodness in your life.
  • Pray before you eat. Don’t act like you are wiping your brow. Bow your head and pray!
  • Pray for an opportunity to speak of Christ. Beware – God will give you an opportunity!
  • Share what your life was like before following Christ.
  • Share the difference Christ has made in your life.
  • When there is an appropriate opportunity share a biblical principle without neccesarily giving a Scripture reference.
  • Invite them to a back door event. (ie. Trunk or Treat, Living Nativity, July 4th Freedom Festival)
  • Our evangelism strategy at Parkview is Invest & Invite. Invest in the relationship and then invite them to church.
  • Walk the talk. Don’t say you are a Christian and at the same time act like the devil. Once you identify with Christ you are now under a microscope!

What other ways do you use to try to speak up and share Jesus?

We are Here

October 27, 2010 in Church Life, Leadership with 1 Comment

Several weeks ago I was able to go hear Gary McIntosh speak at a conference. While there I purchased 2 of his books and both of them have proven to be very good reads and very helpful in ministry strategy. In his one book, Taking Your Church to the Next Level, what got you here won’t get you there, Gary talks alot about how to break attendance barriers in the church.  For the current size of our congregation he says that there are 5 key points of transition that must take place in order for the church to go to the next level. They are as follows:

  1. The pastor’s role – The church must begin to define the pastor’s role as that of a leader rather than a caregiver or manager.
  2. Team of specialists – the staff team must change from being a group of practicioners, who are good at doing the ministry, to a team of specialists, who are excellent at designing ministries, which they lead. No longer are staff needed who are able only to do the ministry themselves. Staff must be able to build a larger program or ministry around their partcular specialty.
  3. Leadership development – the church must begin to focus on leadership development. In large part the church will not grow unless additional leaders are developed to help support the enlarging program.
  4. New ministry development – the church must develop new ministries, programs, groups or classes. One way of doing this is for the church to identify new niches to reach people for Christ
  5. Caregiving by laypersons – caregiving must shift from pastoral staff to laypersons. This is by far the most important transition to be made. This means empowering small group leaders, teachers and volunteers to be “pastors” of small flocks of people in the congregation.

I agree with McIntosh’s assessment and am encouraged by the fact that these 5 key points of transition are already on the radar of our elders and staff.  The one I would be most cautious about is number 4 because starting too many things can bog down the very ministry we are trying to build. I think the emphasis must be on starting ministry, programs and classes, etc., in a very strategic way.

The Lord is doing amazing things at Parkview! The construction is only going to provide us with more opportunities to reach more people. Our church is getting ready to grow again and as leaders we are working hard to be ready for that growth.

October 5, 2010 in Church Life, Leadership, Spiritual Thought with 0 Comments

Did you know that you and I are responsible to help other believers and we are to look for ways to keep them encouraged? Hebrews 10:25 says, “exhorting one another and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.” We are commanded to challenge and build up others and to be more earnest as we see the return of Christ nearing. With this in mind I think we need to ask ourselves some hard questions.

  • How are we challenging others in their faith with our words?
  • How are we challenging others in their faith with our actions?
  • Do we hang out with other Christians and yet never verbally encourage them to move towards Christ?
  • Are we purposeful in stewarding our influence with others?
  • When we see someone going backwards do we have the guts to speak into their life?
  • When someone goes sporatic on God’s House do we act like nothing is happening?
  • When someone’s attitude goes south do we call it out?

Paul demonstrated his passion for people to live out their purpose when we read in Acts 20:31,” So be on your guard! Remember that for three years I never stopped warning each of you night and day with tears.” Paul was not careless about what he saw. He stepped up and called it out and called others up to higher plain living.

There are people you have influence with that our staff and elders do not – will you speak the truth in love if someone gets derailed?

Whatever you do, I encourage you not to abdicate your responsibility. God has given us our influence and we must use it for His glory!

You are Wrong!

September 28, 2010 in Church Life, Leadership with 4 Comments

How do you tell others they are wrong?

How are you about others telling you that you are wrong?

Just recently I had somebody tell me I was wrong. Well, they didn’t exactly say it like that, but they did share with me a concern that they had. What they shared was a constructive criticism in regards to one of our systems/processes. Do you know how I responded in my heart? I loved what they said and was so glad they spoke up! Now, before it sounds like I am bragging – Let me assure you most times this is not my internal response!! In fact, if the truth be known, I am not very good at receiving criticism, even if it is constructive. What I wanted to share with you is what made the difference – it all has to do with my bank account. Let me explain – the individual that shared their concern, had made many deposits into my account over the years. In fact, not many people thank me for my preaching more than this person. I have also served in the trenches with this person. They are faithful and kind and I admire them in many ways. Their bank account was so large with me that I didn’t even notice what would normally be a withdraw out of my account.

The whole event just reminded of the importance of loving relationships. I mean, after all, who wants to get advice or criticism from an enemy. Beyond that, we are so fragile we can’t even handle advice from a neutral party. We best receive advice and constructive criticism from those that we know love us.

The bottom line was, I was wrong, they were right and our church will benefit!

On time for dinner

September 20, 2010 in Church Life, Leadership with 15 Comments

Whenever possible we try to eat dinner together as a family. Thankfully, I have a wife who sees eating together for dinner as a very important part of our routine. At dinner we enjoy praying for our “missionary of the night” and regularly answering a question similar to, “What was the favorite part of your day?”. Tonight was a little different though, it was leftover pizza and every man for himself, therefore we didn’t sit down together and dinner just had a different feel.

My experience got me thinking and I want to now share a parallel story:

This past weekend at church MANY people showed up on time  EARLY for “dinner”. Saturday night at 6 and Sunday morning at 9:30 (sorry, for those who were a part of the 11am crowd – not so much) had MANY arrive early for our Walk Thru the Bible review. Not only did we have a great review that was both fun and inspiring, but then we experienced a unique dynamic – TOTAL ENERGY FROM THE VERY START OF THE SERVICE! Most everyone was present in the auditorium. Rather than half the attenders showing up during the first, or worse yet, second, or worst of all, third worship song. If you were there this weekend you know exactly what I am talking about. From the very beginning the services were dynamic, electric, charged and energized! There is just something to be said for everybody being present “around the table”. I have often felt bad for our worship team, who has worked hard to prepare and has prayed hard for God’s moving, as many people seem to be non-chalant about arriving on time and non-chalant about missing a song or two. If the same number of people strolled in during my message I can’t imagine how that would make me feel. As I talk very open about this situation, I realize an important element – I am the leader and I have not led us to change what has become a bad habit at Parkview. The blame does not lie at the feet of some of our congregation it lies at my feet. I have done very little to correct this situation. No longer!

WE MUST REVERSE OUR PREVIOUS  TREND!!!! WE MUST START ARRIVING EARLY!! FULLY PREPARED TO GIVE GOD OUR VERY BEST WORSHIP!!

In closing, I must not overlook the obvious – a good number of our Parkview family are consistently on time and ready to worship. For all of you who do your absolute best not to be late – Thanks for your model. I will be doing all I can to encourage others to follow your example. I know our church expects me to lead and I know this includes the area addressed in this post.

Throw it in park!

August 31, 2010 in Church Life, Leadership, Spiritual Thought with 3 Comments

Years and years ago, when I couldn’t have been but about 10 or 12 years old, I had a very interesting driving experience. There was a littel snow and ice on the ground in Deleware and I was out with my aunt. All I really  remember is being in a neighborhood and us being stuck on a little patch of ice. Somehow I ended up in the driver’s seat of her little white Sunbird and she and perhaps a good samaritan pushed us to an “unstuck”position. Never having driven in my entire life, I wasn’t wuite sure what to do with the fact that I was now driving in the snow. I am not sure if it was her yelling, or my own panic, but rather than hit the brake I just slammed the car in park. While it didn’t sound to good, it did accomplish the purpose, the car came to an abrupt stop.

While at our recent staff and elder retreat the speaker used the phrase, “park your heart before the Lord”. Life can get so busy…blah, blah, blah…. you could finish that paragraph yourself. Let me just jump to the point – make sure you are taking the time to recalibrate and be certain to park your heart before the Lord.

I want to lead us to be a church that has this as a part of our DNA, but it will never rise past the culture of our individual leaders. As a leader, what has your time with God looked like over the last 2 weeks?

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